The Spiritual Journey of A Seeker

A Sahaja Yoga Practitioner’s Experience of Seeking, Divine Guidance and Overcoming Doubt and Frustration

– Rahul

I have been a spiritual seeker since childhood and at the age of around 20, my seeking was at its peak. I was a student back then in my freshman year at a university.

I remember strolling around campus one evening and ardently praying to the divine that I could not carry on with this seeking anymore. I was tired of looking, trying various techniques, and reading various books to find that precious sublime experience of truth that would quench my longing thirst.

My heart echoed in all its earnestness and intensity “O Lord there must be people out there who are connected to truth, connected to you, for it cannot be that there is only darkness, if there is shadow there must also be light, please connect me to them and through them to you.”

That prayer was the inflection point that changed the direction of my life, for the very next day the answer came. I saw a poster of the Sahaja Yoga meeting on campus and a radiant picture of Shri Mataji. I started going to these classes.

It was not until a year and a half later that I started feeling cool vibrations on my palms and the top of my head. Many people asked me why I continued to practice Sahaja Yoga when I had not experienced any of what was said I would feel for more than a year.

I told them because even though I did not feel any vibrations for a year, I still felt in my heart the peace that the divine was guiding me. I knew where all the other paths that I had traversed before led to, to dead-ends. I knew the synchronicity that was happening in my life was far too many to be a random probability of chance or mere coincidence.

I knew that finding Sahaja Yoga on the university campus and all the prior events that led to it (with prayer being the culminating event) were all divinely orchestrated and not accidental happenings.

It was only clear when I saw all of it in hindsight. I saw that a divine hand had brought me to this point when my seeking had ripened, and it was guiding me so even if I was not feeling the vibrations, I was sensing it at a deeper level. I was assured in the fact that I am being guided by that divine love and therefore I must patiently tread this path.

I also saw the genuineness in Sahaja Yogis and felt the pure motherly love and concern of Shri Mataji which was without any facade. I understood I had gone in the wrong direction in my seeking so first is course correction and only when I return to balance to point zero, that is when I would start to experience things so it can take time.

My ego created doubts, frustrations, and anxiety but I am glad I chose to listen to the voice of wisdom in my heart for I realized that these feelings of frustration, impatience, and anxiety at not seeing the results were also just another layer of mind, a hurdle which needed to be witnessed and transcended. That is what surrender is and why it is so important. That realization opened my heart and opened my Sahasrara and then I never had to look back.

Things are much easier now than it was 20 years ago. All the knowledge is so easily available and now we have online courses running continuously. This is nothing but God’s grace.

If we are able to recognize this and allow the feeling of gratitude sink in our heart and let it expand then for those of you who have not felt the vibrations yet, this might just do the trick 😊.

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You can find the recordings of all sessions if you scroll down the page. Click on “+ Session 1 (Day1 – Day21) and you will find the video together with the handouts referring to topics of that day